Labels: commitment, Newsletter, relationship, transforming limiting beliefs, work life balance

We had a great Teleclass last night! Thank you for everyone who attended. For those of you who registered but didn't make it to our live call last night, you should've received a follow-up email today with a link to listen to the recording. For those of you who didn't register, but would like to listen to the recording, here is the link:

http://www.audioacrobat.com/play/WmPd90VQ

This recording will be available on that site for this week only, so make sure you check it out this week. I will try to obtain the MP3 and put it on my website. When I do, I will post the link here on my blog. So check back often!

My next Teleclass will be "Learning to say NO so you can say YES to your life". So, stay tuned for more information.

If you would like to receive the Mini Energy Breaks Idea List and "12 Stress Busters" that I offered during the Teleclass, please send me an email at Hueina@BeyondHorizonCoaching.com and I will send it to you.

Also, some of the principles and exercises I used in the Teleclass are included in my FREE Intensive Self-Care Kit, and you can download it at my website. Be sure to check out the Free Gifts section for other goodies.

Labels: Free Teleclass, work life balance

Once upon a time, there was a man who was not feeling well. He couldn't pinpoint what his problems were, except a weird "heavy feeling". He felt stuck, stressed out and very unhappy. Despite seeing many doctors & therapists, no one could treat his condition.

One day he saw an ad in the newspaper from a doctor who listed all the symptoms he had. He went to see this doctor and described all his symptoms to the doctor. The doctor asked him when this "heavy feeling" started. He took out a strange instrument with a lens and a bright blue light, and examined the man through the lens. After a minute, the doctor said, "Just as I suspected: you have an advanced case of the WOFRs (pronounced as wofers)".

Of course, the man was now very worried, "What do you mean, I have an advanced case of the WOFRs? That sounds very serious."

The doctor said, "Don't worry, I know how to treat this. Let me show you exactly what WOFRs look like."

He led the man into a mirrored room, and assured him that nothing bad would happen to him. The doctor then left the room, closed the door, and turned on a special blue light, just like the light on the instrument he used to examine the man with earlier.

When the man looked at himself in the mirror, under the blue light, he gasped: "What are those THINGS?!!!" To his horror, he saw many huge ball-like THINGS that were attached to him by heavy chains.

The doctor said, "Those are WOFRs. Those are the thoughts & false beliefs you carry around with you. They are what makes you feel heavy and stuck."

The man almost burst into tears, "Oh my, they are horrible! Is there any cure?"

"Oh, don't worry, it's very easy to treat", the doctor assured him, "I will give you one of those small instruments with the blue light to take home."

The doctor continued, "All you have to do is to shine the blue light on these WOFRs every day, twice a day for 20 minutes. And you will begin to see these WOFRs for what they really are. When you do, they will fall right off of you." So the man went home with his blue light instrument, and for the first time in a very long time he felt a little hope.

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I heard this story from one of Guy Finley's motivational lectures. The WOFRs in the story stands for the "Weight of False Responsibilities". If you are familiar with the metaphysical teaching, you know that our thoughts & beliefs manifest into our own reality. In this story, the false beliefs and false responsibilities manifested into real weights that were chained to the man.

The blue light in the story represents the light of true understanding. It's when we can see our challenges or problems for what they truly are, we can break free from them.

Guy Finley talked about false beliefs & responsibilities such as the need to control everything at all times, to please everyone, to worry about tomorrow (instead of being present) & have everything planned out, to avoid unpleasant feelings/experience at all cost, to make sure that everyone who did us wrong get what they deserve, etc.

I'm borrowing this story to make another point.

You might be wondering by now, "What do you mean by a haunted life?"

Does your life look like a haunted house all year around??? Just like the man in the story, many people are "haunted" by gremlins and ghosts from their past. These ghosts include: negative past experiences & emotional wounds, limiting beliefs, gremlins (inner critics or inner judges), fears (of failure, success, rejection), regrets, resentment, hatred (towards others or yourself), unrealistic expectations, etc. They follow you wherever you go, and stop you cold in your track toward success, happiness and inner peace. The more you try to run away from them or deny them, the bigger and more vicious these ghosts grow. All you could see and feel are these ghosts, and you are either stuck in the past or paralyzed by the worries for tomorrow.

The way to break free from these ghosts is not to run away, deny, or hide from them. The only way you could break the curse is by shining the blue light of true understanding to look directly at these ghosts, and see what they truly are. When you understand the truth about our life is that, we are meant to grow and transcend ourselves, moment to moment, you will be able to see any challenges & problems as opportunities for you to stretch, learn and grow. You will see that whatever happened in the past, or whatever others said about you, is no longer your truth, because you're not that same person you were in the past. Since you're no longer the same person, whatever happened in the past will no longer bind you. You are free to make new choices, take new actions, and adopt new beliefs.

When you can truly understand that, the ghosts will finally disappear. You will be free to be who you really are and live in the present moment -- without the hurt & regrets from the past, or the fear & worry for tomorrow. You will be at peace with whatever happened, with the world, and with yourself.

That's the ultimate freedom.

Labels: attitude, conscious choice, empowerment, inspiration, intention, letting go, making changes, managing emotions, overcoming fears, spirituality, transforming limiting beliefs

FREE Teleclass: "C.P.R. for More Balance and Inner Peace"

• Date: Sunday, Oct. 29, 2006


• Time: 9:00pm Eastern (8:00pm Central, 6:00pm Pacific)


• Cost: no charge, but you must register in advance to receive the call-in bridgeline number and PIN


• Registration: http://www.rx4bliss.com/hueina.htm

Are you over-worked & under-appreciated? Are you struggling to balance work and family? Do you long for less stress & more time for you?

If you feel stuck, stressed, or even burned out, you are not fully “alive”. It is time to “Resuscitate Your Life”, and this Teleclass can help.

I will be presenting this FREE Teleclass tonight. There is still time for you to sign up: http://www.rx4bliss.com/hueina.htm

In this Teleclass you will learn:

• What balance looks like and how to achieve it in your life


• How to shift your mindset and take control of your own life


• How to find your core values and life purpose


• How to prioritize and manage your time


• How to put on your own “oxygen mask” & carve out regular "Me Time"


• How to have inner peace despite chaos

Here is the registration information of this Teleclass:

• Teleclass title: "C.P.R. for More Balance and Inner Peace"


• Date: Sunday, Oct. 29, 2006


• Time: 9:00pm Eastern (8:00pm Central, 6:00pm Pacific)


• Cost: no charge, but you must register in advance to receive the call-in bridgeline number and PIN


• Registration: http://www.rx4bliss.com/hueina.htm

I hope you can join us. If you are interested but cannot attend, please register for the Teleclass anyway. Everyone registered will have access to the Teleclass recording afterwards.

You know how couples seem to have their own secret language, or speak in "code"? If you are in a relationship or marriage, you've probably experienced the positive and/or negative impacts of the secret language of relationships.

Unfortunately, as a professional life coach (and former family counselor), I've seen so many clients and people I personally know suffer from the negative consequences of such code-speaking. The most common scenario is that couples tend to believe that their mate can read their mind. It goes like this: If he/she loves/cares/knows enough about me, he/she SHOULD know how I feel, what I want, and what he/she SHOULD do to make me happy AT ALL TIMES. And this doesn't just apply to intimate relationships. It applies to ALL other social relationships as well, eg. your relationships with your parents, kids, friends, boss, co-workers, etc. Can you relate to this?

Sometimes we don't speak our mind because we are afraid of hurting our mate's feelings, or being rejected. That's understandable. However, if you don't tell your mate what you need, how you feel and what you think, you might end up not having your needs met, and feeling resentful toward your mate. Needless to say, your relationship as well as your mental health will suffer. If the situation continues and produces enough stress in your life, your physical health will suffer too!

The trick is, you can be assertive in a nice way -- with respect and compassion. Instead of saying "You NEVER help out with housework", you can say "I'm really tired today. Could you please help me with laundry tonight?" Using "I Statements" (sentenses that begins with "I") to express your feelings and your opinions, instead of "You Statements", can significantly reduce the risk of making the other person defensive, and as a result get your point across more effectively.

Also, be very careful about using words like "never" and "always" when you point out the behavoir you don't like about your mate. These words makes your statement sounds like a personal attack, rather than dealing with the specific behavoir/event you do not like. You know how you react (instead of "respond") to a personal attack. When you take it personally and get defensive, it's almost impossible to listen to the other person's point of view.

Linda Freeman (TherapyDoc), a clinical social worker/family therapist, illustrates in details (with lots of examples and dialogues) about this phenomenon in her article Speaking in Code: Marital Secret Language. She stresses that, although CODE can be sexy for couples, "We marital therapists stress direct, clear, good communication.... Err on the side of Over-Communication. Leave no message to chance." She said we need to "Talk, talk, talk. Clarify, clarify, clarify until your lover says, Oh, Shut UP ALREADY. I GET YOU".

I can't agree more.

Next time when you see/hear something you don't like, instead of getting all upset & launch your counter-attack right away, ask questions to clarify what your mate really means with his/her words or actions. Use "I Statements" to express your feelings, opinions and concerns. And talk, talk, talk, until you both understand each other and/or come up with a feasible solution.


"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." -- Dr. Seuss

Labels: communication, relationship, transforming limiting beliefs

I'd like to invite you to attend a no-cost Teleclass I will be giving this Sunday evening. I am invited by Dr. Maria Moratto (owner of Prescription for Bliss) to speak at her Dr. Maria Presents Teleclass Series.

Are you over-worked & under-appreciated? Are you struggling to balance work and family? Do you long for less stress & more time for you?

Most people are overwhelmed by the demands & responsibilities of work, family, and life in general. Some people either live in the past with regrets and resentment, or live in the future with endless worries.

Maybe you barely have enough time & energy to deal with everyday activities, let alone enjoy life or pursue your dreams. Perhaps you have put your life on hold for your family, and now wonder what your life purpose is or which direction to go.

You probably feel stuck, stressed, or even burned out. In other words, you are not fully “alive”. It is time to “resuscitate your life”, and this Teleclass can help.

In this Teleclass you will learn:

• What balance looks like and how to achieve it in your life


• How to shift your mindset and take control of your own life


• How to find your core values and life purpose


• How to prioritize and manage your time


• How to put on your own “oxygen mask” & carve out regular "Me Time"


• How to have inner peace despite chaos

Here is the registration information of this Teleclass:

• Teleclass title: "C.P.R. for a Balanced Life"


• Date: Sunday, Oct. 29, 2006


• Time: 9:00pm Eastern (8:00pm Central, 6:00pm Pacific)


• Cost: no charge, but you must register in advance to receive the call-in bridgeline number and PIN


• Registration: http://www.rx4bliss.com/hueina.htm

Labels: conscious choice, Free Teleclass, inner peace, perspective, priority, stress management, work life balance

Labels: commitment, inspired action, perseverance, perspective

The Personal Growth Carnival is up at Bryan C. Fleming's blog. There are 27 articles with tips & strategies for personal development, spiritual growth, self-love, self acceptance, forgiveness, affirmation, parenting, productivity, goal-setting, financial & business success, etc. Go over there and feed your soul. :-)

Labels: empowerment, goal-setting, inspiration, letting go, parenting, productivity, self love, success

Taking good care of your physical health is an important aspect of Intensive Self-Care. Don't forget to get your annual physical including a Pap smear and the HPV test (HPV is a virus that's been linked to cervical cancer). If you are a woman age 40 or older, you probably know you should take annual mammogram too.

October is National Breast Cancer Awareness Month. You can get all the information about breast cancer as well as how to get involved with National Breast Cancer Awareness Month at their website.

If you or someone you know have metastatic breast cancer, here is a useful resource I came across today.

Living day-to-day with and managing HER2+ metastatic breast cancer can be challenging. However, with some knowledge and support, you can face breast cancer head-on and HER connection is a program designed to help you do just that. The HER connection Program will provide you with resources you need to help you understand more about your disease.

Enroll now to receive important information about your condition, your options, and how to partner with your healthcare team. In addition, you will receive a complimentary music CD "Healing Sounds". You will also receive a personalized Doctor Discussion Guide to print out, with essential information, including:

• Descriptions of the specialists who may be part of your healthcare team
• Explanations of the roles and responsibilities of these different team members
• Questions on a range of issues you may want to ask the different members of your team as you confront metastatic breast cancer

The HER connection program makes it easy for you to get reliable information about HER2+ metastatic breast cancer, as well as tips for coping with your emotional and physical symptoms. Simply visit HER connection to get started.

Take good care of yourself. You are irreplaceable.

Labels: health, Intensive Self-Care

Welcome everyone to Carnival of Healing #56! This is my first time hosting a blog carnival, so I'm very excited.

One of my mottos that I often share with my coaching clients, is an African proverb: "Heal yourself first, before you heal others". It is extremely important to nurture & heal yourself, if you are in a position of nurturing others. So, how do you heal yourself? I call it "Intensive Self-Care", i.e. nurturing yourself physically, emotionally and spiritually. That's why I categorize this week's posts into 3 groups: Mind, Body, Spirit. We've got some thought-provoking and informative articles this week. Happy reading!

Mind

Patricia at A Better You Blog presents "How To Know Who You Are In 20 Minutes". She wrote, "Your choices are based on your identity, yet every choice you make determines who you are." If you know who you are, you can then "choose to act in alignment with your core self and follow what path you have chosen", to make the changes you need to make. Patricia offers a 20-minute writing exercise and some powerful questions to help you unveil your authentic self.

Erek Ostrowski at Verve Coaching presents "Being Effective With People: Part 1 (Listening)". Listening is probably one of the most difficult people skills to master. As a coach, I know how many relationships suffer because one or both partners in the relationship does not listen, or does not know how to listen well. Erek said, good listening requires "Being available to receive someone else’s communication means we are unclouded by our own thoughts, emotions, judgments, or assumptions." He also explains human communication, from a metaphysical point of view, as "an exchange of energy", and illustrates what happens when you are truly listened to. Very fascinating point.

Body

Familydoc at Bunk offers simple yet effective strategies to relieve stomach & intestinal discomfort, and clarify some myths about fasting in Settling Your Stomach

Aparna at Beauty and Personality Grooming teaches us how to practice "Anuloma-Viloma pranayama breathing exercise". She stated, "Due to increased oxygen intake during this pranayam exercise, one feels clear headed and calm. Regular practice helps in relieving stress, cold, mild fevers, eye and ear problems, etc. It is also beneficial in migraine, chronic sinus problems, blockages in the arteries of the heart are removed, and blood circulation is also improved. Your approach towards life will also change for the better i.e from negative to positive." Sounds like something worth trying!

Dr. Aleksandr Kavokin at RDoctor Medical Portal brought to our attention that, "in U.S. along over 60 million people are obese, and the proportion young overweight people have more than tripled in last 25 years". He urges us to pay attention to this world-wide epidemic, and offers an Obesity Quiz for you to see how much you really know about this subject.

The 2nd post by Dr. Aleksandr Kavokin at RDoctor Medical Portal offers a Carpal Tunnel Syndrome Quiz, which helps you gain better understanding of this increasingly prevalent health issue in our modern society.

The 3rd post by Dr. Aleksandr Kavokin at RDoctor Medical Portal gives a very detailed definition and possible underlying pathology of the Yellow Poo. As amusing as the title sounds, this is actually a very informative article.

Wenchypoo at Wisdom from Wenchypoo's Mental Wastebasket helps us decode the confusing and often deceiving food labels in A Nutrition Label Epiphany (L-O-N-G). Next time you are buying something with any fat content, you will be more mindful to "read between the lines".

Spirit

Raymond David Salas at ZenChill.com reflects on the joy and insights he gained from his recent weekend getaway, and offers the key elements that helped him make this joyful shift in Satisfy Your Soul.

Lonnie Hodge at ONEMANBANDWIDTH An American Professor in China wrote a touching article "How long is a cancer year?" about his ongoing care and support for Ms. Yue, a remarkable Chinese lady battling cancer. He includes a poem for Ms. Yue, as "one of dozens of poetic anniversaries that will serve, by comparison, to happily distance her from disease".

Joe Caterisano at Help With Everything presents "How to be happy", which offers concise and simple strategies to stay positive and happy. It's a gentle reminder of some time-tested, proven strategies.

Madeleine Begun Kane at Mad Kane's Humor Blog presents "Ode To Genetically Altered Cats". Seems like scientists have found a solution for cat-lovers who are allergic to cats! Humor and laughter is definitely good for your soul.

That's all for this week's carnival. Thank you all for participating and reading. Next week the Carnival of Healing will be hosted by Spiral Visions on October 28.

Carniva of Healing Archives

Carnival of Healing at the Blog Carnival

Carniva of Healing Submission Form

To volunteer to host future carnival

Labels: Carnival of Healing, communication, healing, health, inspiration, managing emotions, relationship

Labels: getting support, learn to say no, productivity, setting boundaries, time management, work life balance

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Table of Contents:

1. Welcome & Announcements
2. Featured Article
3. Recommended Reading
4. Quotes of the Week
5. Resources for Your Balanced Life
6. Just for Fun

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1. Welcome & Announcements

We have a bunch of new subscribers from our "Intensive Self-Care Strategies" Teleclass. Welcome to my Nurturers Circle.

In my previous newsletter, I shared my personal goal to compepte in a Chinese Kung Fu tournament (2006 Wong Fei Hung North Eastern All Kung Fu Championships) on September 23rd. Thank you SO MUCH for everyone who sent me emails to wish me luck and offer me words of encouragement.

I am happy to report that I competed in my very first Kung Fu tournament as planned, and won two gold medals -- one for Northern Hand Form category and one for Internal Weapons category (Wudang Tai Chi Sword). What an exhilirating experience!!! I'm so proud that I stuck to my goal and competed. I've been taking martial arts training for 5 years and I find it very empowering for me physically, mentally and spiritually. Martial arts training allows me to continually challenge myself, test my patience & perseverance, and help me overcome some self-doubt and fears. At the tournament, I got to see so many martial artists with so many different styles, and witness their dedication & determination. It's really inspiring & empowering. You can read about my experience & thoughts about the tournament and see more photos at my personal blog.

How about you? Do you have a personal or career goal that you feel compelled to achieve? Go for it!!! You never know if you can do it until you try. Get whatever support you need, and take the first baby step today! If you would like some support or feedback from me, please feel free to drop me an email. I'm here for you.

F.R.E.E Goals Report:
Many people have taken advantage of our F.ree Goals Report. Do you know your Top Three Goals? It's a good idea to re-affirm your goals for 2006 and plan ahead for 2007. Take this F.R.E.E 5 Minute Goal-Setting Quiz and download your F.R.E.E Goals Report complete with your personalized Wheel of Life, goal charts and Top 10 Tips to help you achieve your goals. Take the quiz now

F.R.E.E Intensive Self-Care Kit:
If you are feeling overwhelmed, stressed, or stuck in your life, struggling to balance work & family, and have no time to nurture yourself, you might be heading for Nurturing Burnout. Download your F.R.E.E Intensive Self-Care Kit from my website now. This kit provides insights, tips and exercises to help you set your priorities straight, practice Intensive Self-Care, restore inner peace, manage stress and achieve work/life balance. You can get it here

If you'd like coaching to be more productive, drop me an email. I have a couple of openings for individual clients and several spots to do trainings with your business or group this year. If you'd like to talk about possibilities, contact me at Hueina@BeyondHorizonCoaching.com. Let's get to work!

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Upcoming events:

Teleclass: “C.P.R. for a Balanced Life” -- I am invited by Dr. Maria Moratto (owner of Prescription for Bliss) to speak at her Dr. Maria Presents Teleclass Series. It's scheduled for Sunday, Oct. 29 at 9:00pm Eastern Time. There is no cost for this Teleclass, but you must register in advance to receive the call-in bridgeline number and PIN.

Teleclass: "C.P.R. for a Balanced Life"

• Date: Sunday, Oct. 29, 2006


• Time: 9:00pm Eastern (8:00pm Central, 6:00pm Pacific)


• Cost: no charge


• Registration: http://www.rx4bliss.com/hueina.htm (to receive the call-in number and PIN)

Most people are overwhelmed by the demands & responsibilities of work, family, and life in general. Some people either live in the past with regrets and resentment, or live in the future with endless worries. You probably feel stuck, stressed, or even burned out. In other words, you are not fully “alive”. It is time to “resuscitate your life”, and this Teleclass can help.

In this Teleclass you will learn:

• What balance looks like and how to achieve it in your life


• How to shift your mindset and take control of your own life


• How to find your core values and life purpose


• How to prioritize and manage your time


• How to put on your own “oxygen mask” & carve out regular “Me Time”


• How to have inner peace despite chaos

You can get all the details & register at: http://www.rx4bliss.com/hueina.htm

If you cannot attend, please register for the Teleclass anyway. Everyone registered will have access to the Teleclass recording afterwards. Hope to "see" you at our Teleclass.
__________________________________________

The Teleclass "Intensive Self-Care Strategies" that Kathy Atkinson (www.EFTdownloads.com) and I presented on Oct. 6 went very well. We talked about the definition & importance of Intensive Self-Care, the root cause of "over-nurturing", the warning signs of Nurturing Burnout, and how to use my C.P.R. model to proactively create more balance, inner peace and time for yourself. Kathy also took us through an EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) process to break the resistance (such as guilt, limiting beliefs, gremlin messages) that keeps you from making yourself a top priority. The call was about 70 minutes long, and packed with valuable information. If you missed the Teleclass, don't worry, I've put the recording on my website. You can download the MP3 here.

For a complete list of upcoming Teleclass & live workshops, go to:
www.BeyondHorizonCoaching.com/whatsnew.html

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2. Featured Article: "From Self Sacrifice to Self Love"

If you know anything about Chinese culture, you'd know that "self sacrifice" is highly admirable, even expected, especially for women. Men are also expected to self sacrifice, but usually only for a higher cause, like family honor, the emperor, or their country. The bottomline is, most people avoid being perceived as selfish at all cost, and they put their own happiness & self-worth at the mercy of others.

After 17 years of living in the US, I know that Chinese is not the only group that have this kind of values & beliefs. We are all more alike than different from each other. Most people make the mistake of making other people responsible for their happiness. They sacrifice their own needs, dreams, even self-esteem to "prove" their love for their loved ones. In return, they hope they will receive love and happiness. The truth is, you will never be happy unless you have enough love for yourself. I invite you to make the shift from self sacrifice to self love.

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3. Recommended Reading

Does your spirit need a little uplifting? Read Expect a Miracle. It will serve as a gentle reminder for you to have faith.... in the Universe (or any Higher Power) and also in yourself.

Sometimes circumstances seem so hopeless and you feel like giving up your goals. Read Don't Quit to re-affirm your resolution.

In the article Loving Yourself, Rebbie shows us 3 simple steps to un-block the flow of self-love.

I participated in the Carnival of Healing #54: Self-Care. This blog carnival is a weekly round-up of personal Web sites and blogs on the topics of holistic health, wellness, spirituality, and self empowerment. Coincidentally, most of the submissions in this particular week were all about self-care, one of my favorite topic. :-) Read the articles that were included in this blog carnival. Hope you find some inspiration & motivation to take better care of yourself.

I am hosting the upcoming Carnival of Healing which will be published on my blog this Saturday October 21. If you would like to participate, submit your post. Be sure to stop by my blog to read the new carnival articles on this Saturday!

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4. Quotes of the Week

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." -- Dr. Seuss

"You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist." -- Friedrich Nietzsche

"When the heart breaks open, it marks the beginning of a real love affair with this world. It is a broken-hearted love affair, rather than the conventional kind based on hope and expectation. Only in this fearless love that can respond to life's pain as well as its beauty can we be of real help to ourselves or anyone else in this difficult age." -- John Welwood, American psychologist & author

"Do the thing you fear to do and keep on doing it... that is the quickest and surest way ever yet discovered to conquer fear." -- Dale Carnegie

"Be master of your petty annoyances and conserve your energies for the big, worthwhile things. It isn't the mountain ahead that wears you out-- it's the grain of sand in your shoe." -- Robert Service

"Courage comes from wanting to do it well.
Security comes from knowing you can do it well.
Confidence comes from having done it well." -- Author Unknown


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5. Resources for Your Balanced Life

I'd like to introduce you to a fabulous set of resources you'll be benefiting from over and over again. They come from my friend Rebbie at The Yoga of Alignment (YOFA). Rebbie creates many tools for expanded consciousness and joyful manifestation, based on Abraham-Hicks teachings.

Rebbie has just finished a new book called ROOTED IN THE INFINITE: THE YOFA OF ALIGNMENT (Training for Spiritual Awareness, Healing, and Joyful Manifestation). This book explains in great detail the Yoga of Alignmentsystem of meditation (and preparation for meditation). It includes exercises and acts as a complete course ininner alignment. You can get a free download of the introduction and first chapter of the book. She is also offering a free Teleclass on October 18 exclusively for people who have pre-ordered this book. In this workshop she will explore 3 areas of intention: Spiritual, Healing, and Joyful Manifestation.

I recommend that you visit her website YOFA today to check out this book, and many other resources that Rebbie offers. Below is just a few of them.

Free eCourse: 7 Secrets for Manifesting Your Heart's Desire
Learn to meditate with Affirmative Contemplation
Virtual Workshop The Art of Joyful Manifestation
Miracle Tools for Great Relationships

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6. Just for Fun

Sometimes you don't want to mix alcohol and fun. Here's the aftermath of a girls night out.

What happens when English and German both try to become the official language of EU? I sent the story of EuroEnglish to my German friend Ute, and she got a kick out of it. :-)

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Copyright 2006 Hueina Su, Beyond Horizon Coaching. All rights reserved. www.BeyondHorizonCoaching.com

You may copy or forward this newsletter provided that the author's name, the attribution of the article and this copyright information is intact.

The attribution should read: "Hueina Su is the Founder and President of Beyond Horizon Coaching, a national coaching/training company specializing in helping women nurturers practice Intensive Self-Care, manage stress, prevent/overcome Nurturing Burnout and achieve Work/Life Balance. Download your F.R.E.E. Intensive Self-Care Kit at her website www.BeyondHorizonCoaching.com. To subscribe to her newsletter "Intensive Care for the Nurturer's Soul", send a blank email to subscribe@BeyondHorizonCoaching.com. Visit her blog: http://nurture-me-coach.blogspot.com for the latest news, tips and resources for women who nurture."

Labels: attachment, commitment, EFT, empowerment, goal-setting, Intensive Self-Care, Newsletter, perseverance, personal development, self love, spirituality, work life balance, YOFA

After years of sticking to the basic network channels, we have recently installed satellite TV, so we can watch Chinese programs. My "ulterior motive" was to spark the interest of Chinese language and culture for my children, by exposing them to Chinese TV programs. Well, the jury is still out on this one, but I got some insights from the Chinese soap operas that I'd like to share with you.

My husband and I were watching this show about a group of young people who have complicated relationships -- you know, A loves B and B loves C, that sort of thing. Some of them are secretly loving someone, but wouldn't express their feelings, because they think "the other person" is better at providing happiness for the person they love, and therefore they should "sacrifice" themselves for the best interest of the one they love. Of course, there's all the guilt, "should's", insecurity, and regrets. All of them act like they are not worthy of love, and their happiness & self-worth are entirely dependant on whether or not they receive the love from someone else.

"Oh, come on!", I exclaimed in disbelief, "This is the 21st Century! They are still showing this kind of story on TV??!!!"

If you know anything about Chinese culture, you'd know that "self sacrifice" is highly admirable, even expected, especially for women. Men are also expected to self sacrifice, but usually only for a higher cause, like family honor, the emperor, or their country. The bottomline is, most people avoid being perceived as selfish at all cost, and they put their own happiness & self-worth at the mercy of others.

After 17 years of living in the US, I know that Chinese is not the only group that have this kind of values & beliefs. We are all more alike than different from each other.

It reminds me of a story that don Miguel Ruiz (author of "The Four Agreements") told in his book "The Mastery of Love". In the story, a man and a woman were in love. They loved, respected & appreciated each other for who they really are. They had fun and enjoyed their time together. There was no envy, jealousy, and no trying to control or possess each other. Then one day, the man's heart was so full of love & joy that a miracle happened. When he looked at the beautiful night sky, he found the brightest, most beautiful star. His love is so big that the star started to descend and landed on his palm. At that moment, his soul merged with that star. He was so happy that he couldn't wait to see the woman and put the star in her hand to prove his love for her.

However, when he put the star in her hand, she felt a moment of doubt. This love was too overwhelming. The moment she felt that, the star fell from her hand, and broke into a million little pieces..... The man was heart-broken, and swore that love doesn't exist. The woman was heart-broken too, for she lost the paradise she once had, due to a brief moment of doubt.

Who made the mistake? Don Miguel Ruiz said, the mistake was on the man's part, thinking he could give the woman his happiness (the star). The truth is, happiness can only come from within us, not outside of us. They were happy before because of the love inside of themselves. As soon as he put his star in her hand, he was making her responsible for his happiness, and nobody can be responsible for another person's happiness. That's why she had the moment of doubt and broke the star.

The truth is, you will never be happy unless you have enough love for yourself. Sadly, most of us are like the man in the story, trying to give our precious star to someone else, and desperately hoping they will love us back and make us happy.

Instead of looking outward for love, I invite you to practice Intensive Self-Care, which is an act of self-love. What is Intensive Self-Care? I define it as taking good care of yourself physically, emotionally and spiritually. It includes (but not limited to) beliefs & behaviors such as loving & accepting yourself unconditionally, respecting yourself, honoring your own needs, having regular "Me Time" for yourself and things you enjoy, eating a balanced diet, having enough sleep, exercising regularly, having annual physicals, having quality relationships (family, friends, colleagues, life coach, mentors) that support you, managing your time according to your core values & priorities, knowing how to ask for what you want, asking for help when you need it, honoring & pursuing your dreams, knowing how to say "No" and stand up for yourself, etc.

Intensive Self-Care is NOT being selfish and it's NOT a luxury, but rather an essential practice for your survival and overall well-being. It's especially critical if you are in a nurturing role, either in your personal or professional life. It's like putting on your own oxygen mask FIRST before you help others put on theirs, when the plane hits turbulance in mid-air. You wouldn't be of much use to your loved ones if you didn't put on your own oxygen mask and couldn't function at 100%. You could even end up stressed out, burned out, or have dis-ease.

So, how do you practice Intensive Self-Care? Here are some questions to get you thinking:

• What are my most important values?
• Am I honoring my needs, values & priorities?
• What can I de-clutter (delete or delegate) from my schedule to make room for ME Time?
• What am I doing, on a regular basis, for my physical, emotional and spiritual well-being?
• What are my non-negotiable self-care practices? (for example, reading, tea time, yoga, exercise, meditation, monthly girls night out, yearly physical check-up, massage, pursuing a hobby, etc.)
• What support can I get from my family, friends, co-workers, or other help professionals?

* Related article: The Magic Kitchen

Labels: getting support, inspiration, Intensive Self-Care, personal development, priority, relationship, self love, setting boundaries, transforming limiting beliefs

I'd like to introduce you to a fabulous set of resources you'll be benefiting from over and over again. They come from my friend Rebbie at The Yoga of Alignment (YOFA). Rebbie creates many tools for expanded consciousness and joyful manifestation, based on Abraham-Hicks teachings.

Rebbie has just finished a new book called ROOTED IN THE INFINITE: THE YOFA OF ALIGNMENT (Training for Spiritual Awareness, Healing, and Joyful Manifestation). This book explains in great detail the Yoga of Alignmentsystem of meditation (and preparation for meditation). It includes exercises and acts as a complete course ininner alignment. You can get a free download of the introduction and first chapter of the book. She is also offering a free Teleclass on October 18 exclusively for people who have pre-ordered this book. In this workshop she will explore 3 areas of intention: Spiritual, Healing, and Joyful Manifestation.

I recommend that you visit her website YOFA today to check out this book, and many other resources that Rebbie offers. Below is just a few of them.

Free eCourse: 7 Secrets for Manifesting Your Heart's Desire
Learn to meditate with Affirmative Contemplation
Virtual Workshop The Art of Joyful Manifestation
Miracle Tools for Great Relationships

Labels: healing, Law of Attraction, YOFA

* * * * * * * * * * * *

Expect a Miracle
by Dr. Kiya L. Immergluck

It's hard to believe that my old friend, Roberta, has been gone for 7 years. We were good friends in high school and went in and out of each other's lives many times over the next 30 years. Her name was Roberta Friend and the name suited her so well---she was kind & generous and had a smile that could light up a room.

The first time we got back in touch after high school was when Roberta came home to Chicago & introduced me to her beautiful baby boy named Eric. Some years later, we found each other again & she was raising her little boy alone by working as a waitress in a little Mom and Pop restaurant.

In the years before her death, Roberta took a great interest in the plight of the homeless. Almost single-handedly, she followed her vision and created a wonderful agency called "Goldie's Place" that still exists to this day. It is a place where homeless people can get all kinds of free services and support.

The last time we re-connected was as fellow cancer survivors. We attended some healing workshops together and she participated in my Support Group for cancer survivors and their families. I witnessed Roberta face her cancer with tenacity, faith and courage until the end of her life.

The Unity church (Unity in Chicago), where she belonged and gave so tirelessly of her energy and love, was filled to capacity at her Memorial service. I wondered if I would ever see her son, Eric again. He had grown into a fine young man.

Recently, I was invited to a gathering at the new home of Eric and his wife, Jean. Eric was delighted to see me after all these years and was pleased and proud to show off his beautiful baby boy who smiled that same incredible smile as his gran! dmother. Seeing Eric in his lovely new home with his wife and baby filled me with mixed emotions.

I felt so happy and proud of Eric and so very sad that Roberta never got to see her son's new home or her look-alike grandson. Then Eric told me a true story that turned it all around for me.
Last year, when Eric and Jean saw their townhouse for the first time, they fell in love with it immediately and were amazed how easily the process of buying the house flowed for them. When they inspected the inside of the place, Jean noticed a Unity Church book on the bookcase & discovered that the people who owned the house actually remembered Eric's Mom, Roberta.

Eric was happy about the odd coincidence, but the story got even better. At the Closing, the other couple handed Eric an amazing gift. They told him that while they were packing, they came across an old photograph taken at a party in their living room about 10 years earlier, and they wanted him to have it.

In the photo, sitting in the living room of Eric's new home, was his Mom, Roberta, smiling that wonderful smile. The photo was taken several years before Roberta became ill. And now, seven years after her death, Eric had a precious and miraculous treasure: a photograph of his mother "visiting" him in his brand new home!

I said to Eric, "I guess your Mom helped get you this house!" He totally agreed with me. I smiled up at the sky when I left the gathering: "Way to go, Roberta!" I was overwhelmed at first when I saw the photograph, and then noticed something else that made me smile. Sitting next to Roberta in the photo was a woman wearing a t-shirt with the logo: "Expect a Miracle!"

About the Author:
Dr. Kiya L. Immergluck wears many hats. She has been a Psychotherapist & Addictions Counselor for many years. Experiences like the one in her story have led her to Spiritual Counseling & Coaching, as well as a practice offering Spiritual & Creativity Retreats in the greater Chicago area.

Update on Goldie's Place: Roberta's vision for Goldie's Place has blossomed! From her one-person agency that served 130 homeless adults in its first year, Goldie's now engages over 1,000 people a year, assisting them with job readiness and placement, interview clothing, tutoring and free dental care, utilizing a 2-chair dental clinic installed in our office in 2002. Goldie's Place is a testament to the difference one person can make--and a loving legacy to Roberta.

Labels: giving, Higher Self, inspiration, love, spirituality

I have the honor of hosting the upcoming Carnival of Healing #56, which will be published next Saturday, October 21.

Carnival of Healing is a weekly round-up of personal Web sites and blogs on the topics of holistic health, wellness, spirituality, and self empowerment. If you have any articles that fit this description, please submit your post here. The deadline for submission is Thursday, October 19 at 11:59pm Eastern Time. Thank you!

I look forward to reading your posts, and presenting them on October 21.

Carniva of Healing Archives

Carnival of Healing at the Blog Carnival

Carniva of Healing Submission Form

To volunteer to host future carnival

• What are you avoiding/hiding/denying?
• What are you afraid of?
• What's the worst thing that could happen?
• If you turn and look DIRECTLY at your challenge, what do you notice?

Labels: attitude, conscious choice, empowerment, Intensive Self-Care, managing emotions, mental fitness, overcoming fears, personal development, perspective, success

The recording of my Teleclass "Intensive Self-Care Strategies" with Kathy Atkinson is ready for download on my website. If you did not make it to the live conference call last Friday, you can download the MP3 now:

www.beyondhorizoncoaching.com/services/freemonthlyteleclass.html

You can listen to the MP3 from your computer, or better yet, download it to your iPod and listen to our Teleclass anywhere you go. My personal experience is that you can always get more insights & information by listening to a Teleclass more than once. Especially with Kathy's Self-Care EFT process, you will definitely benefit by saving the recording on your computer or iPod, so you can listen to it whenever you need it.

If you have not downloaded your F.R.E.E. Intensive Self-Care Kit, you can get it on my website:
www.BeyondHorizonCoaching.com

While you are there, make sure you check out the Free Gifts section for other wonderful gifts, and the Resource Center for women nurturers. Also check out What's New section and my blog for the latest news and my upcoming events.

I think you will also be interested in attending another FREE Teleclass I am presenting called "C.P.R. for a Balanced Life". I am invited by Dr. Maria Moratto (owner of Prescription for Bliss) to speak at her Dr. Maria Presents Teleclass Series. It's scheduled for Sunday, Oct. 29 at 9:00pm Eastern Time. You can get all the details & register at:

http://www.rx4bliss.com/hueina.htm

This Teleclass is free, but you must register to receive the call-in phone number and PIN for the Teleclass. If you are interested but cannot attend, please register for the Teleclass anyway. Everyone registered will have access to the Teleclass recording afterwards.

I'm planning to offer FREE Monthly Teleclass, if there is enough interest from our group. You can read the details here. Please let me know by email (or sign up at my website) if you are interested in participating. Also, please email me with any topics that you would like me to include in our monthly Teleclass. I welcome any feedback from you. Please leave your comments here or email me directly at Hueina@BeyondHorizonCoaching.com. Thank you.

Take good care of yourself.

Labels: Free Teleclass, Intensive Self-Care

"Your circumstances may be uncongenial, but they shall not remain so if you only perceive an ideal and strive to reach it. You cannot travel within and stand still without." - As A Man Thinketh

For many years I have carried around a poem called Don't Quit. One of the lines says, "stick to the fight when you're hardest hit - It's when things seem worst that you mustn't quit." In our darkest hour it's hard to see the end of our circumstance. All we can think of is our conditions worsening. But it's usually at this time that our greatest growth can occur if we'll see the moment as a growth opportunity. If we'll see it as a time to learn how to control our thoughts toward an ideal that we cherish.

One thing I share with people who seek my advice when they think their life has come apart, is to help them understand the power that even the tiniest of actions can have when taken in a negative situation. Remember in Science class when we learned that "a body at rest tends to remain at rest or a body in motion tends to remain in motion." This is especially true when overcoming circumstances because "paralysis" usually keeps us in the condition longer than we'd like.

But even more important, is that once we've started in motion, even though it may not seem like much, know this - it's now only a matter of time before you're out, totally out, of the situation that has got you down today.

My long-time favorite poem by an anonymous author is worth remembering today:

When things go wrong as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill.
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh.
When care is pressing you down a bit,
Rest if you must, but don't you quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As everyone of us sometimes learns.
And many a fellow turns about,
When he might have won had he stuck it out.
Don't give up though the pace seems slow,
You may succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than
It seems to a faint and faltering man.
Often the struggler has given up,
When he might have captured the victor's cup.
And he learned too late when the night came down,
How close he was to the golden crown.

Success is failure turned inside out,
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt.
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems afar.
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit,
It's when things seem worst that you mustn't quit.

And that's worth thinking about.

_______________________________
Copyright (C) 2003-2006 Vic Johnson
All rights reserved worldwide
Change your thoughts, change your life
Free eBook - As A Man Thinketh
James Allen's timeless classic
http://www.AsAManThinketh.net
________________________________

** Note: I wrote a related article on this subject:
Quitting on the One Yard Line

Labels: attitude, commitment, empowerment, inspired action, mental fitness, perseverance, personal development, perspective, success

The Carnival of Healing #54: Self Care is up at Spiral Visions. I've submitted a post about the launch of my FREE Intensive Self-Care Kit. Coincidentally, according to the Carnival host Phyl, "Taking Care of Yourself" is the underlying theme of most of the carnival submissions this week. How wonderful to know that many people recognize the importance of Self-Care and they are thinking & writing about it.

Go over there now to read about all the Self-Care articles featured in this issue of Carnival of Healing. You might get inspired to take better care of yourself. :-)

Labels: Carnival of Healing, Intensive Self-Care

Our Teleclass "Intensive Self-Care Strategies" went very well today. I'd like to say thank you to everyone who attended our Teleclass. I was invited by my co-presenter Kathy Atkinson (owner of Creative Life Coaching) to talk about the importance of Intensive Self-Care and strategies to nurture yourself, while you nurture others. We talked about the definition & importance of Intensive Self-Care, the underlying cause of "over-nurturing", the warning signs of Nurturing Burnout & the consequences, the common stumbling blocks that keep you from nurturing yourself, and how to use my C.P.R. model to create more balance, inner peace and time for yourself. Then Kathy led us through the EFT process to break the resistance such as guilt or Gremlin messages that prevent you from making yourself a top priority. The Teleclass was about 70 minutes long, and packed with valuable information.

Kathy and I were pleased to see so many people signed up for our Teleclass, and I know those of you who couldn't make it to the live call today are eager to receive the playback information for this Teleclass. Unfortunately, there was a glitch in the conference call service, and the audio podium did not record the Teleclass. Luckily, Kathy and I had decided beforehand that we would like to put the MP3 recording on our own websites, in addition to the audio podium. So, Kathy had recorded the entire call with her own equipment. Yay! Kathy saved the day!

As soon as Kathy gets a chance to edit the MP3 recording, she will send out the follow-up emails to everyone who had registered for the Teleclass. Please stay tuned. I will keep you posted on when I obtain the MP3 file and put it on my website too.

In the meantime, Kathy is offering a special report "10 Daily Habits for High Energy Living". Please send her an email to request it, and also check out her upcoming Teleclass.

Don't forget to also download your FREE Intensive Self-Care Kit from my website. Check out What's New for my upcoming events.

"Don't compromise yourself. You are all you've got".
-- Janis Joplin

Michael Port, marketing expert and best-selling author of Book Yourself Solid wrote a post on his blog about the possible side effects of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition. And he's got some interesting point.

Extreme Makeover: Home Edition is one of the most popular and successful primetime shows on television. Like Michael said, the show is "an extraordinary display of reality television and Big Business American Benevolence". I've watched it several times myself, and it always made me cry. It's very moving to see how the show and the community go out of their way to help the families in need, and to see how appreciative & happy those families were when their new homes were unveiled to them. It's an unbelievable gift from the TV network and the community.

However, just like Michael, I was often shocked at how extravegant these "gifts" are.


The Dream House

The houses are often enormously bigger than what the family had (sometimes from about 900 square feet to 9,000 square feet or more), fully-loaded with state-of-the-art appliances, custom-made cabinets, light fixtures and window treatments, etc.

Michael said, he was worried about the side effects of having your home remodeled by Extreme Makeover: Home Edition. he was worried about how those families could afford the property tax, home insurance, utility and all the upkeeps of such big houses.


The Side Effect

It's a legitimate concern. The property taxes may go through the roof, and the AC & heating bills alone could be 10 times or more than what they had before.


Happily Ever After???

To tell you the truth, as much as I enjoy watching the show, personally, I often wonder if they really lived happily ever after.....

I think the situation is similar to when people go to self-improvement seminars and get all pumped up, and then two days later they are back to their old reality & their old ways.

If they don't have someone to support them & keep them going afterwards, they are mostly likely not going to succeed.

By the same token, it's not enough to give these families this one-time help or gfits, no matter how generous the gifts are.


Sustaining Your Success

To make dramatic life changes like that, and to sustain the success, you really need long-term support.

That's why it is so important to make sure you have a strong support system, when you try to make long-term life changes and/or achieve major personal or career goals.

Depending on your goals, the support you need might be as simple as enlisting a friend to take daily walks or go to the gym with you. Or you might want to join a mom's club, a book club or a support group of any kind. Perhaps you need a professional organizer to help you finally straighten up your closet or paperwork. If you tend to abandon your goals, you might need a professional life coach to keep you accountable and motivated until you achieve your goals. Or, maybe all you need is a circle of friends with whom you can vent and have fun together!


Get Support

The important thing is, get the proper support you need to ensure your own chance of success. Research shows that, when you write down your goals, your chance of achieving them improves by 70%. When you tell others about your goals and ask for support, your success rate will be greatly improved.

You don't have to go it alone. Really.

To help you "zoom in" on your Top 3 Goals, visit my website to take a 5-minute goal-setting quiz, and you will receive your personalized Free Goals Report. If you would like to email me or call me (973) 664-0446 (US Eastern Time) to discuss your goals, please do not hesitate to do so. My door is always open.

I am here for you, whenever you are ready.

Labels: accountability, commitment, empowerment, getting support, giving, goal-setting, making changes, personal development, success