By Michael Neil

"Be quick, but don't hurry."- John Wooden

Last year, I had child psychologist and author Alfie Kohn as a guest on my radio show. At one point, I asked him if he had any tips for how to be a more caring and effective parent when you were in a hurry. His answer, tongue only slightly in cheek, was 'don't be in a hurry.'

While I laughed at the time, the more I thought about it the more I realized what excellent advice that is, not only for parenting but for pretty much any area of our lives.When we are in a hurry, we tend to get sloppy and things go undone or worse still, half-done. Our best intentions often go out the window and our values shift, expediency and 'getting stuff done' leapfrogging their way up the list above such old-fashioned priorities as treating people with respect, doing things right the first time and even enjoying the process.

Stress is a hurrier's constant companion, as there's never enough time and there's always too much to do with it. As time gets short, tempers get shorter, and a frayed nerve often snaps in the face of a loved one.

Here are six ways to slow down without getting further and further behind...

1. Just say "no"

With so much that it feels like we have to do (not to mention all the things we actually want to do), how can we get everything done without hurrying through the majority of it?One answer is 'we can't', and in that sense the most powerful time management tool in the world is the word 'no', as in "No, I won't take on that commitment of time and energy (but thanks so much for asking! :-)"

2. Find a time management system that works for you and actually use it

There are any number of time management systems on offer today, and most of them will be effective to the degree that you actually use them. If you're self-employed or left to your own devices at work, I highly recommend the work of Mark Forster (see the 'Want to Learn More?' section at the end of this tip to learn more).

3. Become less efficient

While Parkinson's law ("Work expands so as to fill the time available for its completion") has never been repealed, sometimes allowing our work to expand is just what the doctor ordered. Giving yourself more time than you need to complete a task can be great fun if you consciously use that time to engage more deeply with the task.

4. Get help!

In his research into sustained personal success, management consultant Marcus Buckingham isolated one key factor that all the subjects in his study had in common - they had figured out what they didn't like doing and by and large, stopped doing it. The easiest way to do this, of course, is to delegate it to someone else.

I've only recently gotten up the nerve to hire an assistant, and already I wouldn't be without her. It's like being the cobbler in the story of the Elves and the Shoemaker - each night I put out a list of what I want done and the next time I walk into the office, it is!

5. Single-task

For those of you who are reading this tip while drinking a coffee, watching the news, filing your nails, and/or speaking on the phone with a client, one of the most valuable experiments you will ever do is to spend a day doing only one thing at a time and notice the difference. When you are reading, just read. When you are eating, just eat. When you are with someone, just be with them.

6. Do what you love (and love what you do)

When you're doing what you love (and loving what you do), you will tend to naturally engage in each of the other five strategies mentioned above...

*You'll say no to most things because you're already doing what you love.
*You'll tend to use time management systems because you'll need to - otherwise you'd work 24 hours a day
*You'll gladly sacrifice efficiency for the joy of getting to indulge in your passion
*You'll get help with the stuff you don't love so you can spend more time with what you do
*You'll do one thing at a time because it's so wonderful for you to do them

Today's Experiment:

1. What can you say 'no' to this week? This can be anything from an invitation from a colleague to a TV program to the voice in your head telling you all the things you 'should' be doing instead of reading this tip!

2. Buy a copy of Mark Forster's amazing new book, 'Do It Tomorrow and Other Secrets of Time Management'. It's only available from the UK at the moment - you can get it via this link.

3. When you're estimating the time it will take you to get things done this week, multiply by 1.5 (i.e. give yourself 90 minutes for each hour's worth of work). Feel free to play with that ratio (either longer or shorter) - you will find there's an optimal amount of time expansion that allowsyou to eliminate the hurry without turning it into procrastination.

4. Find at least one thing you don't like doing you can outsource this week. Don't let yourself be limited by money - feel free to beg, borrow or barter!

5. Experiment with single-tasking. Remember, just because you *can* do three things at once doesn't mean you're going to enjoy doing them.

6. If you're not already doing what you love, choose a mundane task (washing dishes, watering plants, etc.) and practice loving doing it. Just as an experiment, do it with energy, enthusiasm, and like it matters - as if it's the most wonderful and important thing in the world.Have fun, learn heaps, and take your time - after all, it is yours to take!

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WANT TO LEARN MORE?
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Here are some of my favorite resources for taking your time
and letting go of 'hurry':

* "Help Yourself Get Everything Done and Still Have Time to Play" by Mark Forster

* "Six Seconds to True Calm" by Robert Simon Siegel

* "Time for a Change" by Richard Bandler

* "You Can Have What You Want" by Michael Neill
(go to Michael's website to read the introduction online)

©2006 Michael Neill All Rights Reserved
www.geniuscatalyst.com

Labels: getting support, learn to say no, productivity, setting boundaries, time management, work life balance