One of the most important keys to success is knowing what you want (your goals). In coaching, I often see people who either are not clear about what they want, or, not sure about how to get it. Having a clear intention and goal is the very first step. It's important to know not just what you want, but WHY you want it. You might need to do some soul searching to have that clarity. A professional life coach can help you with that. Knowing WHY you want a particular goal will help you stay focused and persevere when you hit a roadblock.Once you are clear about what you want, it's time to come up with an action plan to move you toward your goals. It's helpful to have a mentor, colleague or a life coach to brainstorm with you, give you guidance, and offer resources. Another effective strategy is using a mastermind group to help you achieve your goals.
A mastermind group, by definition, is a group of like-minded people sharing common goals. As with one-on-one coaching, a mastermind group also offers accountability and support for the members. I have written several posts on using mastermind group for personal and business success. Evan Carmichael's Mastermind Group Resources blog is a great resource to check out.
There are many ways you can use a mastermind group to help you achieve your goals. Today I'd like to focus on one specific key to getting what you want, and that is, asking for what you want. It sounds so simple and common sense, but, you'd be surprised that many people don't ask for what they want, or don't know how to ask for what they want.
People don't ask for what they want for many reasons. Maybe they don't know exactly what they want (lack of clarity). Maybe they are afraid of being judged, ridiculed or rejected. Maybe they don't want to "impose" on or burden others. Maybe they are afraid of appearing to be pushy or needy. We sometimes assume that if we ask for help, others will think of us as inadequate or incompetent. The truth is, most people want to be helpful to others, and they will happily help you if only you would ask for it. In my previous post The Gift of Receiving, I pointed out that, by asking for help, you are actually giving the person a gift, because he/she gets to experience the great feeling of giving/helping someone else. All you have to do is ask.
I remember almost 20 years ago, when I attended the Landmark Forum and the Self Expression and Leadership Program, one of the assignments was for us to make an "unreasonable request". We did it over dinner break, and over the weekend. That was an eye-opener. Most people came back to report that they thought they were making very unreasonable requests, and were fully prepared to be turned down. Instead, they were amazed that they got what they wanted. Obviously, some of these so-called "unreasonable" requests were not so unreasonable, after all.
If you don't like the idea of asking for help, substitute the word "help" with "support". We all need a support system. As human beings, nobody can survive without the support from others. It's completely healthy and essential to ask for the support you need, in both your personal and professional lives.
Coming back to mastermind group. It's important to let your group know exactly what your goals are, and what kind of support you need from them. Perhaps it's weekly accountability check-in and encouragement; perhaps it's certain type of leads; or perhaps it's specific tools or resources for your project. Let your group members know what you need, and set up the structure (e.g. weekly check-in calls, accountability buddy) that supports your goals.
I found this wonderful mastermind resource at Mary Robinson Reynolds Make A Difference site. At her site you can find inspirational movies (I highly recommend them) and other resources, including MasterMinding. She listed "7 Steps to the MasterMind Connection". They are:
1. I SURRENDER ordinary thinking.
2. I FOCUS my intention to be open to all possibilities.
3. I DECIDE differently. Within and without, I call all things past, all things present, all things future, a success.
4. I KNOW that, when two or more minds come together in the spirit of harmony, peace and good will, the accomplishment of my goals, dreams and desires will be intentionally created through this alliance, to bring about easy effectiveness, energy and good to all.
5. I ASK my partner's support in seeing and believing for me what I really want.
6. I ACCEPT and receive all that I am aligned with.
7. I DEDICATE myself to be of maximum service to those around me, to be a living example of what humanity can be and to practice "harmlessness" in generating peace, love, harmony and good will in my world. I am grateful and relaxed … and so it is.
Mary has written a complete script that you can use, and instructions of how to use this MasterMinding process. You can use it with another person, or with a mastermind group. As Napoleon Hill wrote, “No two minds ever come together without thereby creating a third, invisible intangible force, which may be likened to a third mind.” It is in this "third mind" that possibilities thrive.
Whether you use this MasterMinding process or something else, the point is, to get what you want, you've got to ask for what you want. It's something that's worth trying in your next mastermind group meeting, and in your everyday life.
1. I SURRENDER ordinary thinking.
2. I FOCUS my intention to be open to all possibilities.
3. I DECIDE differently. Within and without, I call all things past, all things present, all things future, a success.
4. I KNOW that, when two or more minds come together in the spirit of harmony, peace and good will, the accomplishment of my goals, dreams and desires will be intentionally created through this alliance, to bring about easy effectiveness, energy and good to all.
5. I ASK my partner's support in seeing and believing for me what I really want.
6. I ACCEPT and receive all that I am aligned with.
7. I DEDICATE myself to be of maximum service to those around me, to be a living example of what humanity can be and to practice "harmlessness" in generating peace, love, harmony and good will in my world. I am grateful and relaxed … and so it is.
Mary has written a complete script that you can use, and instructions of how to use this MasterMinding process. You can use it with another person, or with a mastermind group. As Napoleon Hill wrote, “No two minds ever come together without thereby creating a third, invisible intangible force, which may be likened to a third mind.” It is in this "third mind" that possibilities thrive.
Whether you use this MasterMinding process or something else, the point is, to get what you want, you've got to ask for what you want. It's something that's worth trying in your next mastermind group meeting, and in your everyday life.
Labels: accountability, coaching, commitment, getting support, goal-setting, intention, mastermind, personal development, Resources, vision
Your post reminded me about my favorite part of Lanmdark Education's programs--Making unreasonable requests! I remember when I took the Self-Expression and Leadership program, I used to be so annoyed when my coach would ask me to "play bigger" or request something of someone that seemed way too big for me. Only later did I realize it was the best part of the whole program--If I was only going to do what I usually do and make the requests I usually make in life, then what the heck did I need a coach for?
The MasterMind process looks interesting to me--I love the idea that there are things that can come forth when two people collaborate that will never happen individually.